Opening myself up to the world

For a time, a couple of years ago, I recorded a series of video diaries to send to my good friend James. I only say his name here, because you'll hear me mention it many times.

I was going through some very hard times then, and he was a very good friend who helped me immensely. These diaries were actually his idea. They helped both him and me to get me through those tough times.

Well, I've decided to revive the recording of a video diary, and will be posting them on here. This is my most intimate blog, where I'll be revealing myself the most. Normally I prefer anonymity, and I still retain it to a great degree, however if you know my face, you'll know who I really am.

A large majority of these are of me in the throes of depression, but you'll see examples of mania, and panic as well. For clarification, my diagnoses are Bipolar 1 Disorder with psychotic features (which you'll see me describe), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. I think you'll see a mix of all of this in these videos.

I won't just be adding the ones I recorded back then. I'll be recording new ones, just posting them in order of recording, so you'll see the oldest ones first. It will take a while to get them all posted, as it takes a while to upload them. They aren't very long, but the files are a decent size.

My hope is that you, dear viewer, will get a first hand look at what it's like to live with rapid cycling bipolar disorder and gain a better understanding.

Comments are most welcome. Enjoy.